Rustom, aka Bebe Gandanghari, Talks About Gay Rights

(Hong Kong, January 23, 2009) Many years ago he was famous as Rustom Padilla. He was one of a brood of actor brothers, famous in his own right. He was also married to an actress, Carmina Villaroel. In 2002 he left for the U.S. to study film. At the same time he reflected on his life and began to grow in understanding and conviction until one day he decides to come out and in his own words, “accept who I am.”

This was Rustom Padilla then and Bebe Gandanghari today. What went through Rustom’s mind, heart and soul during those trying times when he said, “Nagpanggap din ako,” (I pretended too) until he finally decided to come out and declare to all and sundry who he really is, is the subject of this AHRC interview.

Bebe’s insight into his own process of coming out and acceptance is
fundamental to an understanding of gay rights. Even according to
Bebe, his identity is not a choice but a gradual acceptance of an
orientation which did not happen overnight. Every part of the process
of awareness, acceptance and coming out is not to be taken
simplistically and dismissively.

Giving voice to one’s person is not an issue among typical male and
female members of society We hear them all the time, a male or a
female doctor, a female or a male lawyer, a priest or a nun, etc.
Gay’s do speak but in certain societies in hush tones and hidden
corners. Indeed, there are Asian societies where their voices are
considered a public disturbance. Bebe explains how different his
experience is among Filipinos, women in particular. “For some reason
they seem to like me and even identify with me,” explains Bebe. Why
do they like her? What do they exactly like about her?
Notwithstanding some unfavourable past experiences with some family
members, colleagues and others, Bebe finds Philippine society not
that bad. However, she really felt free and encouraged to come out
when he was in the U.S. Coming to voice is easier in a less
judgmental and open society.

Bebe’s coming out is not a purely psycho-emotional experience. “It
is more, ” he explains.”It is being able to stand naked before
God…being able to be yourself before God,” she adds. “Be as you
are…be as you are supposed to be…that is what BeBe means,” she
explains.

Listening to one gay person, allowing her to speak, to come to voice
is fundamental to understanding gay rights. Fr. Robert Reyes, explains
that his previous judgmental and homophobic attitude towards gay was
only corrected, perhaps somehow cured through actual and particular
encounters with gays. Avoidance, ignoring, rejection simply promotes
the prejudice and the unwillingness to understand, accept and
ultimately respect gays as persons with rights like everyone else.

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About AHRC: The Asian Human Rights Commission is a regional
non-governmental organisation monitoring and lobbying human rights
issues in Asia. The Hong Kong-based group was founded in 1984.